i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize