We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
