Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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