What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
