Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
