We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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