There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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