Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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