i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
