plz talk dirty to me
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
