all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
