your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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