If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
