u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
