we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
