why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It's shark week go big or go home
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
