windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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