sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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