Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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