I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
