After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
