You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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