Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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