Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Never joke about your clitoris.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
