they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
