It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
