My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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