Screwed.edu
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
