No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
