i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
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