Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
