Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize