So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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