yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
