I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
