Pregnant stripper...not hot.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
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