try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
