Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize