so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
