you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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