I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
We smell like vodka and hangover
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