She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
