Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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