I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
