Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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