i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
