I wish i was in the wii world.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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