We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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