You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
