shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
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