party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
