Joe is yelling at the trees again.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
